[ video ]

[ananym]

[ there's a pretty vampire, looking into the camera curiously before speaking. ]

I have been meaning to ask. Is there anything that you have learned here that has changed your lives?

Comments

[ananym]

[ that's hard to deny. ]

I would not say it is quite so luxurious.

[abracafcku]

[In a complete deadpan]

If you've never had to eat out of a garbage can so you don't starve to death, it was pretty luxurious.

[And back to the usual teasing lilt]

Not that you'd have to eat. More like drink, right? Do you eat regular food? Akeldama can, but it's like a party trick to him, not real sustenance.

[ananym]

I can, though I do need to feed from time to time.

[ he can manage long periods of it, especially if he's resting for years at a time. ]

I am half-human after all.

[abracafcku]

So...what're you doing about that here? You got someone who's willing to hook themselves up to be a blood bank for that pretty face?

[ananym]

I have not asked yet.

[ which is bad but. ]

I will get to it when the thirst is stronger.

[abracafcku]

...UH isn't that bad? To wait until it's stronger? People don't exactly think clearly when they're hungry, my dude.

[ananym]

It is unlikely I will lose control.

[ after all, when has alucard lost control. ]

And I rather not put pressure on the Fleet just yet.

[abracafcku]

[Unlikely doesn't mean "won't" and that slim chance is enough that it sets Taako's paranoid survival instinct into hyperdrive.]

Don't they give you like- the Atroma? Don't they give you something else you can use in place of eating people? Because that seems like a super oversight on their part if not.

[ananym]

[ alucard raises an eyebrow. ]

I've never been hit with such an urge before. Nor have I ever "eaten" anyone.

[abracafcku]

Oh, pardon my vernacular - drink from them.

[He doesn't really get the difference except that you can do one through a straw. Not that he thinks Alucard is going to stick a straw in someone, even if that imagery makes him snicker a little.]

D'you prefer blood or are the- ugh, I'm even loathe to call anything they serve in the un-augmented kitchens this - but is the "food" [He throws up some air quotes just to make sure Alucard knows his opinion on the gels.] here sufficient?

[ananym]

[ thankfully, alucard has the patience of a saint. or he's just immune to nonsense. ]

As I said earlier, I am half-human. Blood is necessary but not a preference.

[abracafcku]

Yeah, half-humans are pretty normal where I'm from - half-orc, half-elf, halflings, half-gnome, all sorts. Just curious 'cause like half-elves live a long time compared to full humans, but not as long as a full elf. Unless their human side wins out, then I guess they might only live marginally longer than humans. Was wondering where your dual nature drew the line.

[ananym]

Unfortunately, I could not tell you beyond my own experiences. I'm the only one of my kind, as far as I know.

[ he can't imagine many others surviving. ]

[abracafcku]

Fair - not sure how many people wanna go shagging up their greatest natural predator. Your mom must've been a total badass.

[ananym]

[ his lips curve. ]

She was.

[abracafcku]

[Why is it always "was" with parents? Ugh. It's like some unwritten rule that parents have to be dead here or something.]

So, did she give you any hints on how best to stab the fuck outta your dad? That's your thing, right? Killing the fuck outta him?

[ananym]

[ his expression slips a little. ]

I was not aware patricide is a fun joke.

[abracafcku]

[Taako shrugs.]

My parents have been dead as long as I can remember, so yeah sure. Everything's a joke to me at this point.

[ananym]

That would explain your credentials.

[ or utter lack of them. ]

She was burned at the stake. That's why my father went mad.

[abracafcku]

What the fuck.

[Because he can't even goof on that. That's pretty fucked up? No, that's super fucked up???]

What the actual fuck? Who just burns a woman at the stake? That's-- [Taako gestures wildly at the communicator.]

What the fuck!

[ananym]

[ yep. alucard just waits it out. ]

She was a doctor accused of witchcraft. For the church, there is no quarter.

[abracafcku]

Wow. So she was a cleric and they burned her for it? What a bunch of shitheads.

No wonder you've never been to a church or a temple. They're a bunch of assholes. Fuck, I'd want to destroy them after that. No wonder your dad went psycho.

[ananym]

But it is not what she wanted. For him and . . . for the people she helped, despite her end.

She would never want genocide.

[abracafcku]

Kinda the shitty thing about grief, huh? It's super selfish but it's not like you can help it if it drives you insane.

[Doesn't mean genocide is justified though. That one? Kiiiind of a deal breaker for Taako.]

But yeah, probably, you're right. If he wanted to just burn that stupid church and those people down, go for it, but genocide's taking it a bit far.

[ananym]

[ his fingers lightly brush against his own chest. ]

He is beyond reason now.