driftfleet | 'cause it's better than nothing

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'cause it's better than nothing

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(last updated: 1/25/19)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Naw, I can do it. I just wasn't sure how much you knew about our magic system.

[Here we go. He points the wand forward and easy as pie, casts Magic Missile. Three bolts of energy split off from the tip of his wand and streak through the empty amphitheater, striking three different chairs and pummeling them into oblivion.

Then he turns and flicks his wrist, a pool of black spreading out along the ground in front of him. It spreads into a square and from the depths black tentacles shoot up, grasping at nothing in particular until they find a few chairs from the front row. The tendrils grab them, dragging them into the writhing mess and Taako snorts, turning back to look at Tim.]

Since this is and isn't real, I basically got unlimited spell slots in here.

[Tim is smiling at the display]

Your magic is really amazing. I mean I had never imagined being able to see these spells being performed in real life... or a dream... whatever. It's just really amazing.

If you wanna see me burn spell slots out in the real world, you just gotta ask, my dude.

[He spins the wand in his hand and then taps the tip of it against his lip.]

I mean, I'm not gonna waste any I need, but considering how often we find ourselves doing absolutely jack shit, I could probably do with a distraction.

[Tim shakes his head]

In the real world, it seems like a waste. There's so much you could be using your magic for that is useful. You don't need to waste it on me and my curiosity.

Working on your recipes and such.

I don't need magic for recipes, my man. That's a natural talent I got.

[Also, he's still got a preference for real ingredients over transmuted. Sure, no one is sick and it wasn't his magic that caused the problem in the first place, but every so often he gets struck with a chilling fear and refuses to use magic in the kitchen. It's still a learning process.]

Besides, there's nothing that happens out there that requires my higher level spells. The biggest thing I've done is Polymorph into a whale.

You've never used magic to, I don't know, give a food a supernatural effect? like turning someone's hair purple or making it envoke a good memory?

and why the hell did you turn into a whale? and where?

[His fingers flex at the suggestion because, sure, he might have at one point in his life, but now? Nope. He wouldn't dream of messing with food in that way, the lingering fear of having something go wrong with food he's created too strong to let him experiment that way. Enchantments and potions put too much unknowns into the mix.

Contrary to the tension in his shoulders now, Taako scoffs.]

And risk my brand? Fuck no. I have pride in my work, thank you very much.

And if you want to know the whale story, ask me when I'm awake.

[Okay, Tim can now tell he's hit a sore spot maybe a slight change of topic is a good idea]

What exactly is your brand anyway? Like is the travelling cooking show the entire gimmick or is it a certain type of food? or just your flamboyant personality?

It's everything, my dude.

[He seems to perk up a little, given the opportunity to talk about something innocuous and yet important to him.]

The show, my flavor profile, my personality - you don't get to be a celebrity based solely on the product you put out. Although that matters - natch - people come for the food, but they gotta have a reason to stay. And that?

That's Taako. I got the magic and the flair to make anything stick. Was thinking of a line of cookbooks, cookware, t-shirts, gotta get that apparel line in there - oven mitts, drinking cozies, dish towels, aprons, the works.

Don't forget miniature versions of your hat?

[Tim is teasing]

There's a celebrity chef in my world who has many spin-off shows, one is a competition for chefs to work in his restaurants around the world. One he does with children, and another where he travels to different failing restaurants to help them change to succeed.

Just if you wanted an idea to poach or something?

Oh, but then you run into the problem of which hat? I have more than one - can't be tied to just one piece of headgear.

[And the competition sounds interesting, although the idea of having to work with children makes him want to die. Whipping shitty restaurants into shape sounds fun though. He'd get to insult the fuck out of people.]

Less poaching and more... Borrowing. I'll have to see if I'm willing to get back into the spotlight first. It's been nice having a vacay.

No, you'd just make the witch's hat your headgear. You don't have to pick one piece of headgear but more make the silhouette part of your brand. Then you can wear lots of different variations as long as it stays the same silhouette.

[Tim shrugs]

Shows poach from each other all the time and you're not even in the same universe so I don't think anyone will notice.

As long as it's not on Fantasy Netflix. Haven't had a chance to catch up on anything there lately, what with the whole world-saving thing taking precedence.

[But someday he'll binge-watch everything he's been missing. And on that day, ohhh on that day, no one will be allowed to bother him, talk to him, or interrupt his watch list until he's either dead or done.]

I'll take the idea under consideration. Lately, I've been more known for the-- well, not anything technically since no one can know about what I do -- but the adventuring gig is bringing in more money than the cooking anymore.

Wait, you have Fantasy Netflix... you have to tell me what kind of shows are on that. I'm just picturing fantasy versions of Ultimate Ninja Warrior and Stranger Things where it's an actual Demogorgon...

I can completely see you on the Fantasy version of Queer Eye.

You could do the adventuring to fund the passion project though? cause you clearly enjoy the cooking gig more.

Dunno! Haven't really been in a position to watch it for uh...years.

[He gestures vaguely at not only the wagon around them, but the empty amphitheater outside.]

So the same kinda goes for, y'know, starting up the cooking thing again. After...what you saw, people aren't exactly going to be lining up to eat what I made even if I'm not the one responsible.

[And he also still feel uncomfortable with it. Sazed is still out there and if he were to start up a new business, how long would it be before he caught wind? Would he try to do something like this again? Taako can't risk it - can't play with people's lives that way. Not again.]

[Tim looks around him again, his mouth becomes a thin grim line as he thinks about how many people must have died that day]

You didn't say who was actually responsible for what happened? Was it all an accident or did someone set you up?

[He sighs and shakes his head, exhausted more than angry at this point.]

That fucker who was helping me - Sazed. He got mad that I wouldn't let him join the show and decided, "Hey! Poison's a great negotiation tool!" He probably hoped I'd die with everyone else, but cha'boy's lucky like that.

He dipped out the second we got to a town and I haven't seen him since.

Sazed is an idiot.

Do you ever want to find him again? At least let him serve a sentence for his crimes? Because I have a hard time imagining that someone who would be willing to kill that many people just to get back at one person would not repeat offend.

[Taako scoffs. The real idiot is Taako here, for ever trusting that sleazeball to begin with. But in the beginning? It'd be fine. He'd thought Taako hung the moon, did whatever Taako asked of him with no complaints, acted as bodyguard and bouncer and driver. It'd been fine.

Until it wasn't.]

Pfft, if I can? I'd rather go the rest of my life never seeing that jackass ever again. There's no proof he did what he did, so even if I did find him, catch him, and get him to authorities?

[Taako shrugs.]

He said, he said situation. I'm the one that made the food and served everyone.

[You fed them their death. That's what the Chalice had said and it's true. He'd done that.]

Easier to just... I dunno, not bother. I'm never going back to Glamour Springs and as long as local militia never catch wind of where I am, I'm clear.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

'cause it's better than nothing

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