When We're Rollin Through the Wild Wild West

[geonomy]

Who: Everyone! EVERYONE!
Broadcast: IF YOU WANNA
Action: Everywhere! EVERYWHERE!
When: Mid-September - Mid-October

[How's your ship doing, pardners? Is it still pretty damaged? Is it glitching out hardcore? Well, there is one place to land to take care of all that, and that's on a dusty old moon in front of a planet that no one wants to go to. On this moon, you'll find a civilization that looks a lot like one's stepped into a wild west movie, hardened cowpolk and mutant horses and all. Will you become a vigilante, hunting bounties and stopping gangs from doing their dirty work? Will you go exploring planetside, with a cowboy hat and a stalk of wheat in your mouth to complete the look? Good luck with that; there is no wheat. This town ain't big enough for all you flooters, but make it so! For the ratings!

In other words, it's a planet mingle! Get 'er done!]

[September Planet info here]

Comments

[experiencepoints]

Yeah, it's like the one time this uniform is useful.

[Yeah, a purple magical girl dress with a cape? It's a uniform. Really.

Also, sorry, Kirito, but she's gay. Though maybe that would make SAO better, if Kirito's harem just went off with each other.]

[huaaaaagh]

[that would absolutely make it better, since he only actually wants one of them anyway

As uncomfortable as her short dress is likely to make him, he'll give her that.]

And here I am dressed all in black... I really didn't think before going out into the desert, did I.

[experiencepoints]

[I 100% support this AU.]

Yeah, I... was kind of wondering about that.

[huaaaaagh]

[SAME]

Ah... I didn't really have anything to change into, so...

[Truth is, he isn't sure how changing clothes works on avatars outside of a game, so he hasn't tried yet. He's worried about losing the armor somehow by de-equipping it.]

[experiencepoints]

I have a couple of spare uniforms. Want me to lend you one?

[The minidress, she means.]

[huaaaaagh]

[NOPE NOP NOPE NOPE Kirito can already envision the disaster that would cause. He's already been in two situations involving a girl, a misunderstanding, and someone's underwear. He has zero desire to get slapped for something that isn't even his fault.]

N-no, no, that's- that's okay! I'm getting used to it. Besides, your clothes might not be the right fighting class for me.

[experiencepoints]

They're clothes, they're not class-dependent... But okay.

[huaaaaagh]

Well, it might depend on the type of clothing it is? Different kinds are good for different fighting style. The outfit I have now is armored for melee and it's light enough that it won't hinder my AGL stat.

[experiencepoints]

Yeah, I get that.

[The names of the stats are different, but the concept is the same, she understands.]

But that's equipment, these are clothes.

[huaaaaagh]

Where I'm from, the clothes affect stats just as much as the equipment. Is it different in your world?

[experiencepoints]

I mean... You can go into battle with them so you're not naked, but clothes' stats are all zero. There might be an exception I don't know about, but...

[huaaaaagh]

Huh. What about armor? Can you boost your defense with that?

[He's trying to get a feel for what kind of style her game-esque world might be without, you know, asking her genre or something.]

[experiencepoints]

[SNES might have been before your time, Kirito.]

Well... Obviously? I mean, I equip robes. Warriors and tank classes go for the heavy armor, and archers and physical fighters use the chain or leather.

[huaaaaagh]

[He vaguely recognizes the name as a big deal in video game history.]

Oh, got it- so that's what you meant by equipment versus just clothes. I guess it's similar in my world, then.

[experiencepoints]

Yeah. What kind of class are you, anyway?

[huaaaaagh]

Warrior-slash-tank-slash-swordsman. When I can actually get a sword, anyway.

[Prospects thus far are not great.]

[experiencepoints]

... So, you don't do the specific classes, then.

[She sounds kind of disappointed...]

[huaaaaagh]

Some people do. I've just never been really particular about it, that's all.

[Maybe Berserker Class would describe him best? Or dual-wielding, but he's still keeping that very hush-hush around here while no one knows him.]

What kinds of classes do you mean?

[experiencepoints]

Well...

[She sighs. Her normal fidgety habits are really hard to do on horseback, so she settles for just shaking out her hair.]

... I almost miss being able to just show people my memories, it made explaining a lot easier...

The six basic classes where I'm from are Mage, Healer, Archer, Fighter, Lancer, and Monk. Those have really low requirements, so most everyone can access those classes, so they're the 'base' ones. Most other classes are built out of those.

[huaaaaagh]

We had a few of those, though some sort of blended together. People would focus on offensive magic or healing magic, but most had at least a couple of spells for each. We never had a monk class, but there's a sort of ninja class.

[wait]

You can show people your memories?

[experiencepoints]

Fuck ninjas.

[No offense, Ino, she's bitter over a different one.]

Not at my home. That was the place I was before here. It's a long story.

[huaaaaagh]

[Wow, rude, the Spriggan class is basically a ninja, too...]

Oh, you too? I've heard that's the story for a few people stuck in this place.

[experiencepoints]

... At least the castle was more honest about how it was trying to humiliate and hurt us.

[She sighs.]

Yeah, there's a lot of us here on our second interdimensional shithole. Only me and Magpie from where we were, though. It's that 'Paradisa' place that has a bunch of people from it.

[huaaaaagh]

Paradisa...

[He definitely recognizes that name.]

Were you there when hundreds of pomeranians were attacking people?

[experiencepoints]

I was never in Paradisa. What's a pomeranian?