[ video ]

[ananym]

[ there's a pretty vampire, looking into the camera curiously before speaking. ]

I have been meaning to ask. Is there anything that you have learned here that has changed your lives?

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[ananym]

[ he shakes his head. ]

The castle was magic. It could travel and take care of itself.

[abracafcku]

[...Diiiiid not see that one coming.]

Is just, like, everything about your life just weird or what?

[ananym]

You base yourself on a piece of paper. Do you really have any room to talk?

[abracafcku]

It's certification, my dude, not my base. Do you not like, get certified in your world? Universities? Shit like that?

[ananym]

There are cathedral schools and so on.

And ultimately, it still sounds like a piece of paper.

[abracafcku]

Ugh, temple schools - gross.

[He knows what those things are like - stuffy, dogmatic, a total buzzkill. Nooo thank you.]

And it ultimately still sounds like you have no idea how to appreciate the ethereal beauty of an elf.

But also? Temple schools are gross. Blegh.

[ananym]

I would not know. I've never went to one.

[ and alucard's training far exceeds any school. dracula after all, was the greatest repository of knowledge. ]

[abracafcku]

Count yourself lucky. I snuck into one once thinking I could scam a few things off the priest and I nearly died from boredom.

[ananym]

[ he smiles. ]

Oh, I know I'm quite fortunate in that area.

[abracafcku]

'Cause you stayed in a magical castle with potentially demonic servants that probably catered to your every desire? Yup, definitely fortunate.

[ananym]

[ that's hard to deny. ]

I would not say it is quite so luxurious.

[abracafcku]

[In a complete deadpan]

If you've never had to eat out of a garbage can so you don't starve to death, it was pretty luxurious.

[And back to the usual teasing lilt]

Not that you'd have to eat. More like drink, right? Do you eat regular food? Akeldama can, but it's like a party trick to him, not real sustenance.

[ananym]

I can, though I do need to feed from time to time.

[ he can manage long periods of it, especially if he's resting for years at a time. ]

I am half-human after all.

[abracafcku]

So...what're you doing about that here? You got someone who's willing to hook themselves up to be a blood bank for that pretty face?

[ananym]

I have not asked yet.

[ which is bad but. ]

I will get to it when the thirst is stronger.

[abracafcku]

...UH isn't that bad? To wait until it's stronger? People don't exactly think clearly when they're hungry, my dude.

[ananym]

It is unlikely I will lose control.

[ after all, when has alucard lost control. ]

And I rather not put pressure on the Fleet just yet.

[abracafcku]

[Unlikely doesn't mean "won't" and that slim chance is enough that it sets Taako's paranoid survival instinct into hyperdrive.]

Don't they give you like- the Atroma? Don't they give you something else you can use in place of eating people? Because that seems like a super oversight on their part if not.

[ananym]

[ alucard raises an eyebrow. ]

I've never been hit with such an urge before. Nor have I ever "eaten" anyone.

[abracafcku]

Oh, pardon my vernacular - drink from them.

[He doesn't really get the difference except that you can do one through a straw. Not that he thinks Alucard is going to stick a straw in someone, even if that imagery makes him snicker a little.]

D'you prefer blood or are the- ugh, I'm even loathe to call anything they serve in the un-augmented kitchens this - but is the "food" [He throws up some air quotes just to make sure Alucard knows his opinion on the gels.] here sufficient?

[ananym]

[ thankfully, alucard has the patience of a saint. or he's just immune to nonsense. ]

As I said earlier, I am half-human. Blood is necessary but not a preference.

[abracafcku]

Yeah, half-humans are pretty normal where I'm from - half-orc, half-elf, halflings, half-gnome, all sorts. Just curious 'cause like half-elves live a long time compared to full humans, but not as long as a full elf. Unless their human side wins out, then I guess they might only live marginally longer than humans. Was wondering where your dual nature drew the line.

[ananym]

Unfortunately, I could not tell you beyond my own experiences. I'm the only one of my kind, as far as I know.

[ he can't imagine many others surviving. ]

[abracafcku]

Fair - not sure how many people wanna go shagging up their greatest natural predator. Your mom must've been a total badass.

[ananym]

[ his lips curve. ]

She was.