losing it hurt the first time

[somakemelaugh]

Who: Undertaker and WHOEVER!
Broadcast: Video
Action: On the Goldstone, in the lab where Undertaker works
When: Naow


The loss of 20/20 vision had been a crippling thing when his life ended all that time ago and Undertaker found himself thrown to the mercies of the afterlife and what awaited him upon his suicide. No one needed to explain it to him then, but it was a form of control enacted by the gods, designed to keep everyone who followed those same footsteps in check. By degrading vision, something people relied on heavily, and giving them a singular means to correct it, the higher ups were assured that those under their employ would follow the rules.

Only they hadn't counted on Undertaker and what he did to bend those rules. Those first few weeks after his escape had been painful, to say the least. First with the injuries that led to his many scars, then to the headaches as he taught himself painstakingly to live without spectacles. Oh, it hadn't been easy, but it had all been necessary.

Now, it was necessary again, and all in the opposite direction. He was well aware of what he had been missing, forcing himself to cope with only half of the sight he should have had, and what he paid for in the wonders around him, he gained independence. Getting it all back, having his sight not only corrected, but improved, now that one hurt. He had tried to tolerate it, tried to fight through it. But it's quite clear to anyone who comes across him or views the footage that he's having a time of it.

Every few moments, he has to stop what he's doing and cover his eyes. This happens several times before he stops completely and feels his way to a seat in the lab and just sits there, face in both hands, and groans aloud where he thinks no one can hear him.

Poor him. If only he knew...

Comments

action

[sweetlies]

[He hadn't seen the video. Actually, he'd been in the kitchen looking over all the changes that had been made seemingly overnight. As well as the new information his augment had apparently downloaded. So he enters the lab with a bit of a bounce in his step, eager to share with Undertaker and maybe try making something new. Especially since they'd stopped in a new system, plenty of chances to buy some ingredients for their favorite sweets.]

Undertaker!

[Then he stops as he sees the man with his head in his hands and his smile drops in exchange for a look of concern.]

Is everything alright..?

[somakemelaugh]

[There's a welcome voice if ever he's heard one. He settles heavily onto one of the chairs at his desk and waves a hand over toward a cabinet.]

Just a headache. There in that, look for... It'll be a white bottle, says ibuprofen on it. It's something for pain. Bring that to me, please?

[sweetlies]

[A headache? He doesn't wait but as he goes over to the cabinet and finds the right bottle, he tries to think of any occasion where the reaper had a headache or was generally unwell. And not one instance comes to mind.

So he rushes over to his side with the bottle and looks around.]

Do you have any glasses in here so I could get you water?

[somakemelaugh]

[There aren't many times for him like this. It's almost as if he'd forgotten about physical pain, but that'd be silly. It just hasn't hit him like this in so long. But he'll gladly accept that bottle, pop the top, and chew on one, flinching at the taste.]

[It's a chore, but he'll swallow it, then go for a glass of water straight from the sink, in a container best suited for something not what he's currently using it for, but it's clean and he doesn't care.]

That, what I just did, don't ever do that. Stuff's awful to taste, but it gets into the system quicker like that. [With another groan, he moves back to the table and sinks into his chair once again and sets his head in his hands. He hasn't opened his eyes the entire time.] Oh, but thank you.

[sweetlies]

[He's not sure he'd ever seen Undertaker in pain. He'd hidden it well in Riverview when he'd tested the scar removal procedure before letting the boy have his removed.

Ciel makes a face, watching him chew that pill. He'd taken it a couple times in Riverview, never like that, but one of the pills had touched his tongue briefly and he remembers clearly how bitter and miserable it had tasted. He'd vowed to make sure to take large gulps of water any other time he needed anything.]

Are you alright? [Don't think he hadn't noticed that Undertaker's eyes hadn't opened.] I could make some tea if you want.

[somakemelaugh]

[There's a soft sound of acknowledgement from him. He doesn't dare move his head again for a little while, not until the pain killer has kicked in. But he does grin and follow up with a chuckle.]

I seem to have... forgotten what this is like. [At risk of hurting himself again, he lifts a hand and looks over at Ciel, just to see him clearly at even this distance for the first time ever. It only lasts a moment before he hides his eyes again.] And that as well.

[sweetlies]

[He still doesn't completely understand so he comes over and takes a seat near him after her peeks over at the teen. It's still a bit confusing but he's putting some of the dots together.

He knows its his eyes, at least. He'd gotten headaches when he'd first made his contract with Sebastian and had to adjust to using one eye.]

Maybe a cool cloth over your eyes? You can lay down a bit, I'll sit here and let you know if anyone comes in.

[somakemelaugh]

[He shakes his head, very slowly. The clinic is very, very slow these days, as he had expected it to be since the crew is small and getting smaller by the day, it seems. But he would still rather be here in case he's needed.]

Give it a little more time. I need to be here, but I do appreciate your assistance, milord... Was there something you needed?

[sweetlies]

[It has gotten quite small and, much as Ciel appreciates having fewer people to cook for (which means less complaints), it is a bit concerning. What happens when the ship no longer has enough of a crew to sustain it?]

You could lay down in here, I'm sure. [But he won't push. Undertaker, he trusts, knows his limits and whether or not he can handle this.] I wanted to tell you-

The kitchen got an upgrade. More ingredients, and my augment has new information for pastries and such.

video

[nightroadsaint]

[Unfortunately Abel is on the SS Caprine, so reaching out on the video is the only way. Does this gentleman in need of medical help? Responding to the video is also a tall silver haired gentleman wearing an apron. A chef. There's a kitchen in the background of the video.]

Hey there. Are you okay...?

video!

[somakemelaugh]

[He should have guessed. Of course something like this would be on the network. Lesser things have been broadcast. But he'll try to offer the man a grin and shake his head, even though he's not looking at the camera and those eyes are hidden behind his hair.]

I should be, thank you. Just an adjustment period, that's all.

[nightroadsaint]

Adjustment period? I see. I was about to ask if there is something wrong. Just checking in and making sure if everything is all right.

[somakemelaugh]

Oh? I don't suppose you know how to make this go by any faster, do you? [He's half joking. He doesn't expect that there's any way to do that, but he'll ask anyway just to get a laugh.]

[nightroadsaint]

Do you mean the healing or settling in? Healing and settling in takes recovery and time. Now I'm not assuming what you're going through, but you should take your time.

And perhaps maybe dim the lights a little if that would help.

[somakemelaugh]

All very good advice. Somehow I thought this would all be slower than it was. Nothing as regards vision in my time was ever so quick to change. [He waves a hand in the air.] Sight degrades over time and all.

[A short peek at the feed to try and focus a little more, let it adjust a little more, and he settles his hand back over those eyes again.] Yours, have you had trouble with it? I notice you're in spectacles.

[nightroadsaint]

[Shaking his head.]

I do wear glasses due to being near-sighted, but so far I have no trouble with it.

[Still with concern as he listens.]

Speaking of glasses, maybe you should try sunglasses? I have an extra pair I can lend to you if you're interested.

[somakemelaugh]

[Huh. Well, maybe it isn't the same for everyone. He never really had a chance to find out for sure, since his own nearsightedness was artificially developed.]

Does it help? I haven't thought to try it, but I've been keeping my eyes closed when it gets too bad. Why take away just the sight when we can take away the focus adjustment with it?

video

[scalpelofmarmora]

[Ulaz is on another ship so he is not there to see in person, but he does watch the video. As lab support on his own ship, it does make him concerned]

Are you in need of assistance?

video

[somakemelaugh]

[Well, he should have expected this.]

Ah, no, thank you. I'll be fine, just fine. Eyes are going into another focus, you know how it is. [Maybe Ulaz doesn't know, but he's trying to brush it off.]

[scalpelofmarmora]

[Expected help from other lab support technicians? Yeah, probably]

I'm not sure I do. Are you saying that your eye sight is changing?

[somakemelaugh]

[Er. Not quite.]

It's, ah... a bit like that. It's not changing so much as it already has changed. I've had terrible vision most of my life, but now they've gone and made that right again at my request. Trouble is, that's always hard to adjust to. Try looking through the bottom of a glass bottle for a few hours straight and you'll see my meaning.

[scalpelofmarmora]

I think I am beginning to understand then. Your eyesight has already improved, but you are unused to being able to see that much.

[somakemelaugh]

[He lifts a finger and crooks it, almost in a wave.]

Precisely. Always hurts either way. This just hurts more.

[scalpelofmarmora]

I would imagine it would. This way your mind has more to process as your eyesight improves when it used to processing less.

So it was the Atroma who have done this?

[somakemelaugh]

[He would not, but he decides wisely not to do so.]

Just that. But you see, I asked for it to be done. Placed my faith in a world that brought me here for it's own entertainment and profit. What sort of person does that make me? [He giggles, but there's no loathing to it.]