When We're Rollin Through the Wild Wild West

[geonomy]

Who: Everyone! EVERYONE!
Broadcast: IF YOU WANNA
Action: Everywhere! EVERYWHERE!
When: Mid-September - Mid-October

[How's your ship doing, pardners? Is it still pretty damaged? Is it glitching out hardcore? Well, there is one place to land to take care of all that, and that's on a dusty old moon in front of a planet that no one wants to go to. On this moon, you'll find a civilization that looks a lot like one's stepped into a wild west movie, hardened cowpolk and mutant horses and all. Will you become a vigilante, hunting bounties and stopping gangs from doing their dirty work? Will you go exploring planetside, with a cowboy hat and a stalk of wheat in your mouth to complete the look? Good luck with that; there is no wheat. This town ain't big enough for all you flooters, but make it so! For the ratings!

In other words, it's a planet mingle! Get 'er done!]

[September Planet info here]

Comments

[experiencepoints]

... I'll try, just don't let me fall.

[That said, she's going to look for how to even get up on the thing, because she is tiny.]

[huaaaaagh]

I'll do my best.

[He is making zero promises. He does recognize her plight, though, and removes one foot from the stirrup to give her something to step into, offering his hand out for a boost up. Two tiny people on a zebrahorse, surely this'll go great.]

[experiencepoints]

[Fortunately, she's 5'1, so yeah, super-tiny. Easy enough to get her up there, though now she's really, really wishing she had clothes that didn't involve short skirts. Still, only other person around is another girl, so...]

Let's go, then.

[huaaaaagh]

[Kirito's not much bigger in this body, so hey, at least she's in good company.

He catches sight of the skirt riding up a bit as she sits - briefly, before he hastily turns to face forward again, cheeks pink - and switches his hand back to the reins.]

Okay, hold on tight.

[He gives the horse's sides a light kick, starting it off at a trot so she can get used to the ride. Easier to talk with someone at that pace, too.]

[experiencepoints]

[Unfortunately, Nightingale will be taking note of those pink cheeks...]

Are you okay?

[huaaaaagh]

[Ack, crap. Being caught just makes him even more embarrassed.]

Y-yeah, I'm fine. Like I said, it's... hot.

[It's not like he saw anything! He's just. Aware. He'd been in a similar situation with Asuna once, too... how does this stuff happen to him?]

[experiencepoints]

Yeah, it's like the one time this uniform is useful.

[Yeah, a purple magical girl dress with a cape? It's a uniform. Really.

Also, sorry, Kirito, but she's gay. Though maybe that would make SAO better, if Kirito's harem just went off with each other.]

[huaaaaagh]

[that would absolutely make it better, since he only actually wants one of them anyway

As uncomfortable as her short dress is likely to make him, he'll give her that.]

And here I am dressed all in black... I really didn't think before going out into the desert, did I.

[experiencepoints]

[I 100% support this AU.]

Yeah, I... was kind of wondering about that.

[huaaaaagh]

[SAME]

Ah... I didn't really have anything to change into, so...

[Truth is, he isn't sure how changing clothes works on avatars outside of a game, so he hasn't tried yet. He's worried about losing the armor somehow by de-equipping it.]

[experiencepoints]

I have a couple of spare uniforms. Want me to lend you one?

[The minidress, she means.]

[huaaaaagh]

[NOPE NOP NOPE NOPE Kirito can already envision the disaster that would cause. He's already been in two situations involving a girl, a misunderstanding, and someone's underwear. He has zero desire to get slapped for something that isn't even his fault.]

N-no, no, that's- that's okay! I'm getting used to it. Besides, your clothes might not be the right fighting class for me.

[experiencepoints]

They're clothes, they're not class-dependent... But okay.

[huaaaaagh]

Well, it might depend on the type of clothing it is? Different kinds are good for different fighting style. The outfit I have now is armored for melee and it's light enough that it won't hinder my AGL stat.

[experiencepoints]

Yeah, I get that.

[The names of the stats are different, but the concept is the same, she understands.]

But that's equipment, these are clothes.

[huaaaaagh]

Where I'm from, the clothes affect stats just as much as the equipment. Is it different in your world?

[experiencepoints]

I mean... You can go into battle with them so you're not naked, but clothes' stats are all zero. There might be an exception I don't know about, but...

[huaaaaagh]

Huh. What about armor? Can you boost your defense with that?

[He's trying to get a feel for what kind of style her game-esque world might be without, you know, asking her genre or something.]

[experiencepoints]

[SNES might have been before your time, Kirito.]

Well... Obviously? I mean, I equip robes. Warriors and tank classes go for the heavy armor, and archers and physical fighters use the chain or leather.

[huaaaaagh]

[He vaguely recognizes the name as a big deal in video game history.]

Oh, got it- so that's what you meant by equipment versus just clothes. I guess it's similar in my world, then.

[experiencepoints]

Yeah. What kind of class are you, anyway?

[huaaaaagh]

Warrior-slash-tank-slash-swordsman. When I can actually get a sword, anyway.

[Prospects thus far are not great.]

[experiencepoints]

... So, you don't do the specific classes, then.

[She sounds kind of disappointed...]

[huaaaaagh]

Some people do. I've just never been really particular about it, that's all.

[Maybe Berserker Class would describe him best? Or dual-wielding, but he's still keeping that very hush-hush around here while no one knows him.]

What kinds of classes do you mean?

[experiencepoints]

Well...

[She sighs. Her normal fidgety habits are really hard to do on horseback, so she settles for just shaking out her hair.]

... I almost miss being able to just show people my memories, it made explaining a lot easier...

The six basic classes where I'm from are Mage, Healer, Archer, Fighter, Lancer, and Monk. Those have really low requirements, so most everyone can access those classes, so they're the 'base' ones. Most other classes are built out of those.