driftfleet | 'cause it's better than nothing

(OOC: Keep reading or watch from 14:37 until the end.)

[Kitty will find herself taken back to a familiar place. It's the same little town that Meryl and Milly had taken Vash to in order to recover from his fight with Midvally and Legato.

You have just spent the night out on the cliff's edge. Once more trying to figure out what sort of future a killer like you could possibly have. Over a hundred years of life with the one goal of showing that it was possible to live a life without killing a single life had ended. How can you possibly move on from something like that?

Feeling a bit stiff from injuries that were still healing and falling asleep outside on the cold ground that was quickly warming with the first of the twin sun's arrival you open your eyes. Huddled closed next to you is Meryl. She had stayed the whole night with you. Had given you at least a starting point for this strange new life you were being forced to live. To simply stay with her and live your life for the moment. It wasn't much, but it was something as it gave you a purpose to live through each day. She wanted you to live so you would. So long as she is there you think you can at least keep going until you outlive her. After that you're not so sure of.

She suddenly sits bolt upright with a started gasp. She's overslept and was going to be late for work if she didn't hurry. Even in her rush she's so gentle as she helps you up to your feet and lets you lean your weight into her. For someone so small she was incredibly strong in so many ways. Quietly you watch as she runs around the little home the three of you share. Milly has already left for the day but the tall girl had left out breakfast for the both of you. Meryl thanks her as she straightens her hair, makes sure you have some sort of lunch, before running out the door in the clothes she wore yesterday and hurries off to work.

Her footsteps fade away and your feel your heart sink with them. This was the part you hate each day when both girls are at work. The house is so empty and quiet that it feels like death. Only today is different. Your sharp ears pick up the sound of footsteps trying to silently walk up to your door. Why? Who would be coming up here now?

You don't need to wait long for an answer as the door to the house is kicked open. A group of men clearly expecting some sort of fight rush into your home and circle you with guns drawn. You can already find several points of exit. There to their left their circle isn't tight enough. You could easily slip through there. Twitchy over there would be easy enough to scare into shooting too early. With the aim he's got on you he'd never hit you and that would send a chain reaction off leaving these men stunned and you safely away. But you're so tired and you can't find any reason to care as one of the men points at you. You know him and a couple of the others. They were the town folk that Legato had terrorized before you murdered him.] That's him. That's Vash the Stampede alright.

[An angry cry runs through the crowd. They scream at you, slap your face, spit on you, punch, and pull your hair. They're so wild up and screaming for your blood at first they don't even notice that you're not fighting back at all. Rough hands yank your own behind your back. Tying them there securely and then using more rope they pin your arms to your sides before dragging you out of your home. Someone kicks you into the dirt before more hands roughly grab you and sits you on your knees. A gun is pressed into your temple and you find you still don't care. You're not happy to die, but you just don't care.

Only your life is never that easy. They're not ready to kill you they're waiting for someone to finish tying the length of rope tied to you to the bumper of a car. As the engine roars to life the crowd cheers with wild joy.] This is for July!

[The person in the car floors it and you're yanked backwards off your knees. The burning hot, hard desert floor digs roughly and without remorse into your body. Your back, your hands, legs and head. You can feel your shirt shredded underneath you. The injuries from your fight start tearing open as that rope drags you along.

You don't know for sure how long they do this for, but both suns are up and much higher in the sky then you think they should be. Your body trembles in pain as the car comes to a stop and the crowd gathers around you once again.] Well, did you feel some of the pain? For the people who've died because of your reckless behavior?! [You stay silent because he's right. There were so many people dead who would be alive right now had you never been born.] What the hell's the matter with you? Say something! At least make some sort of excuse! [Frustrated the man kicks you hard in your freshly torn up back.]

Somethin's not right here. [Another man comments. The crowd has stopped calling out for blood. They're still angry, but now there is confusion as well. This is not at all what they had been expecting.] Is it possible this guy isn't him?

Could be. Never imagined that guy could be such a wuss.

I am... [With effort you find the strength to push yourself back up to your knees.] I am him. I am Vash the Stampede. [No more running. No more hiding. These people have been hurt because of you and so you're willing to take any pain they wish to inflect on you for that.] You're right about me. I'm just... I'm nothing but a killer.

[Once again the man lashes out and punches you in the face. Mistaking your intentions by what you said.] Don't you get defiant with me! [You fall back painfully onto your back and bullets fly all around your head, but you're not scared. Not because even without trying you can see he's not aiming to kill you, but because you just don't care even if he was.] I've heard enough of your crying! This is for everyone you ever hurt! [Now he finally aims his gun properly to kill you.] Now smile. [It's almost funny. The one thing you use to never have any problems doing, even when you didn't feel like smiling, but you just can't do it anymore.] At least you can have the decency to die like a man! So come on you, shit! SMILE! [His finger tightens on the trigger and you're so sure that the end will finally come now.] I SAID SMILE DAMN IT!

Stop it please! Don't kill him! [Merly's worried voice breaks through the crowd and soon she's at your side. Milly not much farther behind. She carefully sits you back up, but you're so tired it's too much trouble to even lift your head. You let your chin rest against your chest. You're not worried about the girls. It's your head this mob wants.] You don't understand! He fought to protect everyone! I beg you please don't kill him! He just came here to heal! He wasn't going to hurt anybody! [You hear Meryl say this, but she should know better. Never once did you ever go anywhere with the intent to hurt anyone. All you ever wanted was a quiet life of peace, but still everyone around you dies. It likely would have been the same here anyway.]

Get out of the way! [The man pushes Meryl away from you. You may not like the rough handling, but you're glad that he doesn't seem to want her to get caught in the cross fire.] Can a normal human being do all those horrible things!? He had to be the one! Who else could be responsible!?

No! You're wrong!

Then tell me why. [Now the man was on the verge of crying.] Why did Steven have to die such a horrible death, huh? Answer me! [And now he was crying.] Answer me...

[Quickly Meryl stands to her feet again. Her words are firm and confident.] I've watched him for a long time so I know. It's true that he can't avoid fighting, but this man knows how to live. To live like a decent human being. [Ha... human. Meryl, you should know better now.] Shooting him won't help anyone! [The man fires his weapon and while with your head hanging down you can't see it you can hear the way Meryl flinches from the harsh sound of gunfire.]

Don't feed me your garbage! We have the right to shoot this monster for everything he's done! We've lost friends. Families. Neighbors. And even children! We should hate this bastard and now he deserves to die!

But you're wrong. [Mery's voice is once again confident, but gentle now. Almost soothing.] No one ever had the right to take the life of another person. No one. No one ever has the right to take the life of another. No one. And everyone. Everyone deserves a future. [Hearing your own words coming for the first time out of the mouth of another confuses you at first. You had no idea that Meryl felt the same. She always been the most practical one, but she sounded like she actually believed in the words she was saying. Your words. No, not your words. Rem's words. The words you were so sure died when you pulled the trigger.

Raising your head you finally look at your defender. She stands so proud of what she's said that for a moment you do see Rem standing there before you. You never thought you'd see her face again. You whisper her name softly and then she's gone. Meryl standing in her place once more. Maybe you hadn't completely lost everything? If Rem's words can live on in Meryl... then maybe... she hadn't truly died?]

Don' you think that's true? [Meryl smiles and holds out her arms wide. Placing herself between you and the man who is determined to kill you. Just like Rem had done when you were a kid and one of the crew had attempted to shoot Knives.]

Wait! Stay back! [He seems nervous now. No one had expected anyone to come to the terrifying Humanoid Typhoon's defense. He takes a nervous step back and keeps his gun drawn on Meryl. Now you are scared. If he shoots... Meryl. You can't move now. You can tell that if you move it will spook the man to shoot her. This is all up to Meryl now.] Didn't you hear me!? I said stay back!

Please. Please, it's time to stop the fighting now. [She takes a step closer to him with her arms still outstretched.]

Why!? Why are you doing that? Please get back!

[She takes another slow step.] It's up to us to stop the cycle of hatred. If we don't work to end the sorrow this time then the cycle of pain will just continue on. [She, she had not only listened to your words, but she had evolved them. She had understood what you were trying to do!] When we were all born, were any of us made to steal or cause other's harm?

[The crowd is breathless. The man is sobbing. You're in utter awe, but Meryl is calm. Her smile warm as she reaches out and gently puts her hand on the man's gun and encourages him to lower it.

With this simple act the crowd looses their energy. They disperse leaving you and the two insurance girls alone. They will untie the ropes, but you need a moment to sit there after everyone is gone. Some time to fully take in all that you saw.] How could you two be so reckless?

You're the last person I want criticism from. [Meryl says with a light laugh.]

And besides, what we did is what you have always done. [Milly helpfully adds before she sadly lowers her head a little.] And I'm sure; I know in my heart that he would have chosen to do the same.

[You smile even though it hurt. Life hurt, but there was happiness to be found in that hurt. You think about your friends and how they've changed. Yes; even Wolfwood had changed in the end. Things change, but life continues. Suddenly things just seem to click.] You've just given me the answer. [They look at you bewildered.] That's it! It's just got to be! [Feeling so full of emotion you can't stop yourself. Quickly you push yourself up onto your feet and wrap your arms around Meryl in a tight hug.]

Hey! Wait! Uh-- [At first she's stiff from the surprised hug. You've never really done anything like this before. Not this honestly and intimately before. Even Milly looks a little worried that maybe you've been smacked on the head too much.] What are you doing!?

[It just feels so good to hug her. To have her so close and she very quickly relaxes into that hug. You just really need to hold someone right now as you get your thoughts together.

People have many different ways of thinking. Even if a mistake is made as long as a person realizes their mistake; it's possible to make it right again! If you keep your vision clear, then you will see the future. This is what one must realize. Right, Rem?

You made a mistake. You killed Legato. You realize your mistake was trying to leave the girls behind when you should have stayed with them. Should have explained things better to them. So they could have known what danger they were in. You can't bring Legato back so you can't make it right that way, but you can do better next time. You can stop wasting time here and go find Knives. Stop your brother before he can make someone as powerful as Legato was ever again. You had let your vision get cloudy and you lost track of that in your self pitying sorrow, but thanks to Meryl your vision was clear now. You'd stop the circle you think you had fallen into and break out of it.

Suddenly all the stress of the last few... weeks? Months? Never aging you've never been overly great with long passages of time anyway. It all melts away and you laugh. Laugh and laugh and laugh. Together the three of you go home. You stay in the village awhile longer until your injuries are healed.

The towns people are nervous, but after a bit of time they start to warm up to the girls again. They had come to know them before they figured out who you were and it was hard to shun them. Soon it was like the events of that day had never happened.

Your injuries healed, your red coat repaired by Meryl, and your gun once again at your hip you prepare to head out into the desert. Milly brings you Wolfwood's large Cross Punisher. A giant cross that is actually a giant gun. With a grateful smile you take it and give Meryl your word that you'll be back. You've learned from your mistake. No more running away. You'll be back or die trying.

Shouldering Wolfwood's cross you head out in the direction of your brother's energy. A power shared among your fellow Plants. You can feel his pull and you know he must feel yours as well. He knows you're coming.

And then... suddenly... the desert is gone. Instead of the hot burn of the twin suns a strange coldness is in your bones. Kitty should remember waking up on the host ship for the first time from her own experience. The memory fades away from Vash's first moments of the fleet. His panic that he had broken an important promise of coming back or the fear that this was another of Knive's tricks before she's back into the desert. The feathers raining down, the Plant watching her nearby, and that open door still all options for her to choose from.]

[It's a wonder none of the other feathers hit her as she stands there trying to catch her breath and process everything she just saw and felt. She'd been truly and deeply worried about Vash even knowing he's still here. Still safe and alive.

And Meryl. He'd been growing closer to her. They cared about each other, but they weren't together. Not exactly. And this is how they left things? That's all the further they got? Has Vash ever had more memories than this or was waking up on the ship the last of it? He doesn't know what becomes of the two of them in the future? Or if he finds Knives or makes it back? Why would he leave then? Why didn't he just stay?

He can see why she means a lot to him. Kitty wouldn't have killed anyone in that crowd attacking Vash, but she would have fought them off. Yelled. Intimidated them with her powers. Or just grabbed Vash and phased them out on the run. She wouldn't have managed what Meryl did. Wouldn't have agreed so fully with Vash's mission.

Kitty's eyes return to the Plant and then the door. That's right. She was going to go to the door before everything happened. Except, nothing has really happened. She just touched two feathers and if she stands here any longer she'll touch more. And maybe part of her wants that. She wants to see more. To know him better, but that's not really fair, is it? It's not fair to Vash who can't stop her or to herself because it would mean more hearing it from Vash if he did want her to know. She nods to the Plant before heading to and through the door.]

[When Kitty goes through the door she'll find herself in a large and long hallway. The giant bulbs of more Plants line every bit of wall space. Some are broken and dead, but there are a few that still have their cores in tact only they remain asleep. They don't come out to greet her.

Artificial lights will turn on as she walks down the hallway as if leading her down the right path although there's only one way to go. At least there are no more feathers to dodge in here.

At the end of the path is where she'll find Vash. Resting peacefully in his normal red jacket inside a broken glass bulb. He starts to stir as she comes close. Sitting up with a yawn he rubs at his eyes before turning and really noticing that he's not alone.] Oh! Kitty! [He blinks. Surprised to see anyone else here.] So, ah... you probably have a few questions. [He smiles and scratches at a cheek as if he was feeling slightly embarrassed at being caught sleeping. He won't say it, but maybe she'll get a sense about it like one sometimes does when they're in a dream and they just know things, but in here, deep in his core, Vash can't lie.

She can speak to the man. Walk though the broken glass to sit inside with him. Go back the way she came to the feathers. Or further off in the distance is a pod door that reads in bright red neon lights: Emergency Exit. She could simply leave if she wanted to.]

[She moves slowly at first, taking in the situation and checking on The Plants as she goes until she catches sight of Vash at the end and then she moves more quickly toward him. She hurries to crawl inside the bulb the old-fashioned way, not trusting her powers in a place like this.] Vash... [She just drops down beside him, wrapping her arms around him in a shameless display of concern and caring.] Are you okay? [Of course there's no real reason he wouldn't be, but she just saw so many terrible things happen to him in a row it's hard not to feel like he went through all that too. And he did, of course, just not recently.

She shows no interest in that exit now that she's found him.]

[He's quick to hug her back when she holds him.] Okay? [That question is hard to answer honestly because he's not sure what the answer is.] Yeah. I think I'm okay. Nothing physical can hurt me in here.

Are you okay in a non-physical way?

[He hesitates in his answers. Choosing to first take her hand and give it a gentle squeeze.] Some of the stuff here is still painful. I think it might always be, but I think I'm doing better. I'm okay.

[She looks down at their joined hands squeezing his in return.] Yeah. I think I know that feeling.

[Still looking at their hands.] I can see why Meryl is so important to you.

Yeah. She was one of the first to not run away. [He smiles thinking about it.] She's a lot stronger than she looks for someone so short. A lot stronger than I am. [He should know better than to gush about someone you love to someone you also love, but here in his core it was hard to hide how he really felt about things.]

Why did you leave when you were so close to really starting something with her? [Maybe starting wasn't quite the right word, but they weren't together either. Not as far as she could tell. And she knew something about Vash's experience levels when they got together.]

I didn't want to. [If he had any real choice in the matter he wouldn't have been such a drifter to begin with.] But I had to take care of Knives. I couldn't let him go again. If I did then I will never be able to find any sort of peace at home with her. Not with anyone.

How would you have stopped Knives when you found him? [She didn't get the feeling from feeling all his feelings in there that he'd come to the conclusion killing had it's time and place after all.]

I-- Even to this day I'm not completely sure, but I'm not going to kill him. Even after everything he is still my brother. [He sighs gently.] Although I know we'll end up fighting each other. We always do.

I get it. [And she does. This one she gets more than any of the other times when he could have, should have used his abilities to protect people by killing someone else. It's his brother. He's family. He's the only one exactly of his kind. The others she's seen in the bulbs, they aren't living the same kind of life as Vash. How do you kill the only other person like you even when in all the ways that count he's nothing like him. She reaches out to gently touch his face.] You have to figure out what you are going to do though. It's dangerous for you. For everyone. [So much fire power in one place.] There are these things called plans...

Yeah, I know. It's just that my plans usually stink. I do much better when I'm under intense pressure. [He offers her a smile. It's meant to be a joke, but it's also still the truth.] I mean, I sort of have a plan? Talk to him if he doesn't shoot at me. And if he does? Shoot him back until he's too tired to continue or runs out of bullets? I mean, that's kind of a plan isn't it?

Not a good one. For a guy who is against killing you are really comfortable inflicting pain and damage. [She's kind of the opposite. She wants clean, quick deaths if that's what it's coming to. At the word "damage" she touches his arm where she saw him get the scar in his memories.] I'd be worried if you weren't so kind. I'm still kind of worried. [About him. About the life that led him to such conclusions. Not that hers was a great role model of a life.]

I'm not sue comfortable is the right word. [Although he looks down in thought. Was it? Had he become comfortable with the idea? After a moment of thinking it over he decides that is the truth. He does still tend to find a way other than causing pain when he can.] I only do it when it's the last option I have. Some people just have to be stopped and talking isn't always enough.

Yeah... No, it makes sense. If someone doesn't leave you any good options you have to use one of the bad ones. [Killing them, gravely wounding them, removing their freedom of choice and autonomy. None of it's great.] I'm sorry he put you in that position even though he's family.

He wasn't always like that. Me and him? We were so close once. Long ago. [He pauses and looks away from her to the ground.] Is it wrong that part of me still wants that back? Even after everything he's done?

I-- there are times I don't think I can forgive him. And then sometimes I so badly want to.

No, it's not wrong. Of if it is I'd be wrong in the same way. I have people like that. Like Piotr. [She squeezes his hand again and gently rubs it with her thumb.] He was a big part of your life. It makes sense that it would be hard to let go and that you'd hope you don't really have to. Not completely.

He was good once. [He chuckles with little humor to it.] He use to be even more excited than I was about meeting more humans. I want to believe he can be like that again.

But if he can't. If he can't...

I've tried to kill him three times now, but couldn't do it. I just couldn't in the end. But, maybe now... when I've done it once... [He trails off. These thoughts he's carried in his head and has kept him awake most nights for four and a half years that he's never spoken out loud were terrifying out in the open.] I don't want to kill anyone else. Never again. [Tears are starting to stream down his face.] Not him. Not my brother, but he-- he's killed so many people. He killed Rem. What if he can't change? I know I can't go back. Things will never go back.

But...

But...

What if...

I just don't know what to do. I know I must take care of him when I go home. If I have a home to go back to and he hasn't destroyed everything. I think time might really stop, but how can we really know for sure?

I have to and I will. I just... I don't know right now. I don't know. It's been so long. I felt sure that the answer would come to me when I saw him again, but I haven't seen him. I've been here. So I don't know. I don't know!

[Welcome to the spiral that is Vash's thoughts that he usually keeps hidden deep down within himself.]

Hey, hey.... [She pulls him fully into her arms to hold him tightly.] It's okay. We're going to figure it out. You're not alone. You're not alone. [That part felt worth repeating. She even feels her eyes threatening to well up on her seeing how much this upsets him. Of course it does. He feels trapped between bad options and why wouldn't he?]

Do you know what happened to make him change? [Maybe that's the key to getting him to reconsider all of this, but if he's already killed so many people he might not be able to go back. If he lets himself regret it and feel guilty that could be too much. He'll fight that feeling. He'll double down. Still, she wants to help and she can't be there with him and if she could she doesn't know what she could do. Kill his brother for him? She's not sure that helps anyone. But what prison could hold him? What words could change him? Maybe there's a way to take his powers away, but you can still kill plenty of people without powers.]

[He listens quietly and knows that she's right.] You're right. [He returns her hug and also squeezes her tightly. Maybe a bit too tightly, but it felt good to hold someone.] I guess I've been alone for so long I forget that sometimes. [He had her here and he had Meryl back home waiting for him.]

I'm not sure, but I think-- I think it could have been something Steve did. Or something else. [He shakes his head.] It came as such a big surprise that I can't be sure. I just know he thinks he's doing what he must to protect our sisters and himself.

Maybe try asking him when you see him. Make him feel heard. See if you can help him work through whatever initial feelings set him on this path. And...they might have been bad. People weren't kind and accepting of mutants back home. It made it easier for Apocalypse to get other mutants to turn on them. It's harder to do the right thing when you get attacked by the people you're trying to help too. [If his memories showed him anything it was that they had some of that in common. They can both pass for human on the surface and he's spent his life trying to hide his differences and she works to call hers out. She wants to know exactly how people are going to treat her knowing exactly who and what she is up front. But she wasn't always like that. She hid it when it first started happening.]

I'll try. I'm not sure how well that will go, but I'll at least try. [Although he pouts just a little.] And I only attack him because he started it. [Brothers!]

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