[text]

[thebarkside]

Who: Jade Harley
Broadcast: Y!
Action: N/A
When: Todayyy

i got a fox on the last planet and hes awesome
his name is newton and hes the cutest thing in the universe i swear


so with that out of the way
HE IS DESTROYING EVERYTHING D:
everything .___.
this is the biggest nightmare ever
dear wonderduck: im really sorry about me and the fox
but especially the fox

Comments

[feathery]

how is that worse than a chicken

[thebarkside]

i dont know :/
it just seems more severe to me :////

[feathery]

well considering everyone is out for my blood now
you might as well lay it on me
im about to get plucked like a duck fit for roasting

[thebarkside]

no one is out for your blood, goofy
ill pay back anything that he breaks
im doing a bunch of jobs on the planet

[feathery]

nah jade you sold me out
you threw me under the bus and now im trapped under the tonnage of uncountable kindergartners

[thebarkside]

why would they be uncountable

[feathery]

have you ever tried to count a busworth of unruly anklebiters
its not an experience television has ever made look desirable just saying

[thebarkside]

no i cant say that i have
i have never actually seen a bus











OH WAIT!!! they had them in utgard!!!

[feathery]

yeah and they had innumerable children
like there were already a lot of kids around asgard but utgard was like
i dunno i guess it could have given houston a run for its money
maybe
my memorys getting fuzzy im an old bird now

[thebarkside]

dogs and cats are fuzzy
is there a bird equivalent?
they are..... fluffy??

and yes
we are both practically ancient

[feathery]

yup its official the two of us are god damn fossils
well you are im not im getting ready to fizzle up into a ball of downy dust
theres a good word for you
downy
but yeah were relics of universes gone
better watch your back jade or else youre gonna end up piled in my ever growing array of planetary detritus

[thebarkside]

that sounded an awful lot like a threat
newton will avenge me

[feathery]

newton will chew on everything
hes banned from the premises we dont need him to walk off with the femur of an alien jackalope and summon its spirit from beyond the grave or whatever

[thebarkside]

ummmm what?
yes we do!
that would be AWESOME!
i want an alien jackalope spirit friend :(

[feathery]

no way we already got too many pest problems
i mean pet
that was in no way an intentional slip up

[thebarkside]

whoops
i may have just accidentally teleported him to your room........

[feathery]

did you really

[thebarkside]

it is a mystery

[feathery]

im not even on the ship right now what do you want from me

[thebarkside]

youre not?
are you working or just goofing off :o

[feathery]

it is a mystery

[thebarkside]

maybe i will go set up a veggie stand
thats bound to bring in a lot of dough in space right

[feathery]

more than gumballs thats for sure
especially if you hike up the prices for an exorbitant fee like the douche i passed on a corner
dude acted like i was gonna rob him

[thebarkside]

bluhh, thats rude
assuming that you werent going to rob him, of course
maybe you just have a secret dark side youve kept hidden this whole time :/
maybe he was totally in the right! :////

oh hey!!
did i tell you what i found out about the bracelets from asgard

[feathery]

did you find out theyre part of some dark satanic ritual that explains how we got here in the first place