driftfleet | dreams in digital

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dreams in digital

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ROOMS BY CHARACTER

A - C

Connor

D - F

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Haggar

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Lup

(last updated: 1/21/19)

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Ethical is logical for vulcans, a guiding force for many humans, for most species. Without understanding who is actually doing it, it's dangerous to prescribe any sort of ethic or moral code to its way of thinking. The honest truth is we have just the barest scrapes of information, and nothing else, and what scraps we do have just... add up to a whole lot of nothing right now. Data points without any correlation.

_{[ He threw up his hands in exasperation and then quieted, looking to
Spock again. His eyes widened a fraction, the fact Spock was here hitting
him all over again. Trapped, like the rest of them, but god he was here. He
was here and real and saying the things that Spock says and giving him the
looks that Spock did. He felt his throat close in a choke as emotion welled
again, tears threatening once more, hot and stinging. ]}

I know it's selfish, but I really am so glad you're here, Spock.

[Spock doesn't smile. Vulcans don't smile. But the corners of his mouth do turn up the smallest fraction as his eyes go warmer, looking at his friend before him. The sound of his voice cutting off like that is all he needs to hear to know how affected Jim is by his presence. Indeed, thinking about how he would have managed in the same situation, Spock is acutely aware of how grateful he would be to see Jim here after so many years.

He steps forward and rests his hands on Jim's shoulders, bracing them in his palms. Jim's eyes are so bright, right now. Spock won't mention it but of course he notices.]

It is not selfish to desire the company of a close friend in trying circumstances. Your wish was not the cause of my being here. [His grip tightens just a little.]

While the situation is hardly ideal, my place has been at your side for many years, Jim. I too am relieved, if I am to be here, that I am not alone.

_{[ Captains were not supposed to break down. If they cried, they cried
in private. Their pain was not something to show the crew, to ask them to
share. The captain held the crew’s pain and stood as the pillar, as the man
who could work though the pain and the tears and the grief and see them
through to the other side while empathizing with that pain and shielding
his own. That was what captains did.}

_{But even captains have their breaking points. Sometimes it is all just
to much and the shields give.}

_{His shoulders shook in Spock’s grasp and the tears rolled down his
cheeks, letting out a choked sob. His arms wrapped around Spock’s barrel,
holding tight as he pressed his face info Spock’s chest and cried in
relief. It was the second time since seeing Spock, maybe in ten minutes,
but he didn’t care. He was just so happy to have him here, a piece of his
soul finally back in place. ]}

[ Spock didn't have the time here that Jim did. He hadn't spent years without the other, wondering if they'd see each other again. He couldn't imagine such a thing nor could he fully understand what it would be like to have Jim walk back in again, after everything. But even without understanding, Spock could sympathize enough to not think twice about these tears. Not think twice about bringing his own arms up and wrapping them around Jim's shoulders, one hand pressed between the blades and the other just holding his friend steady. ]

I am here, Jim.

[It felt important to say it again. To have Jim understand fully that he was here and intended fully to not leave without him. If, that was, he had a say in it at all. But those were thoughts for another time. For now, he just held Jim as his body shook.]

I am here.

_{[ He knew it was unfair to ask Spock to respond as a human, to lean on is human side, but he was very grateful that Spock, in that moment, chose to act less like his Vulcan side, and more like the human. You never knew how much you needed a hug until you got one.

Slowly he got control of himself, leaning back to wipe away tears, his eyes heavily rimmed in red, puffy from his tears. He smiled softly at his friend, reaching up to cup his face, tracing his thumb over the sharp cheekbone. ]}

I think I'll believe this one hundred percent when I see in the morning, when I'm awake. And we'll figure out where you're staying.

_{[ He didn't care what ship it was, if it wasn't the Tourist, he would move the stars to get Spock on it, with him and Chekov. ]}

[Jim always enjoyed a higher level of physical intimacy than other friends he had. It was in part due to how tactile his captain was but also a testament to the closeness of their relationship. But even so, the touch to his cheek is warm and unfamiliar. Not unwelcome, though. Spock allows it as he looks at Jim's tear-streaked face. Gently his own hand raises, the pad of one thumb rubbing at a particularly visible track.]

I will find you, when we awake. My vessel is yet to be determined but my preference, as always, is to follow under your command.

[Spock isn't sure what else he's supposed to do here. It's his first room and he's fairly certain that there was more to do than just find Jim and bring him to tears. But he can't bring himself to pull away when his captain and dearest friend is still so affected.]

There's a main common room and a kitchen. Find me there in the morning. But if you want to stay here longer, I don't mind. I can make us coffee. Sort of. It tastes real enough, anyways. I have... a lot to fill you in on.

_{[ He smiled, sniffing again when Spock traced his tears, feeling
silly, but not sorry. He was sure Spock found it quite illogical, all this
blubbering, but at least he was kind enough not to say anything about it.
]}

[Surprisingly, Spock doesn't see it as illogical at all. Tears were a human expression of emotion and he could understand such a show after being kidnapped and kept away from one's friends for years. Spock rests his hand on Jim's shoulder to squeeze it once more.]

It is my assumption that you have been allowed a sufficient amount of time alone. As I have no other matters to attend, I believe I will remain with you. However, having consumed your coffee previously, I would ask for the favor of being provided water.

_{[ He gasped, which no doubt looked a bit more ridiculous than usual
given the state of his cheeks and the ruddiness of his eyes. He punched the
other lightly in the shoulder. ]}

My coffee is just fine, thank you! Properly strong to keep you awake on the deck!

_{[ But then he smiled, leaning his head forward and onto Spock's
shoulder. ]}

God, I've missed you....

[Spock's hand pressed securely on the center of Jim's back, keeping it as a reminder of his presence.]

I am at a disadvantage as I saw a version of you yesterday.

[But he understood. He understood acutely what it was to miss someone yanked out of your life abruptly. They both did.]

However, the idea of two years separated from you leaves me confident a sudden reunion would leave me similarly effected. [His hand moved just a little. Not stroking but something like it.]

Although I do not believe, even then, I would consider your coffee 'fine'.

_{[ Those little touches, tiny and probably unnoticed by anyone else, did so much to stitch his heart back together, to close the hole that had been punched through when he'd realized how far from home he was, how far from one of the most important people in his life.

He let out a snort and turned his head, rubbing his face into Spock's shoulder. Ass. But - it was nice. Really, really nice. ]}

Well it's been two years. Maybe my skills have improved. Never know unless you try, right?

_{[ He smiled, winder than he had in a very long time, and went to dream up coffee. ]}

And, as this is a dream, I do not need to be concerned whether or not I will survive the experiment.

[Spock does his not-smile and follows behind Jim, not quite knowing what else here he's supposed to do.]

This room. [He should probably discuss it] Did you create it knowingly?

_{[ Kirk paused and looked around the deck, and the addition of the
table. ]}

I... don't quite know. I think perhaps I partially did, in wanting to be somewhere comfortable, but the table and the planetary display - I don't think I made that knowingly, as you say. I understood it when I saw it, but I don't remember purposefully creating it either.

[Spock moved to get closer to the display, reaching out once more, drawn to the small planets moving around.]

I do not understand it. [It was a painful confession to make for someone like Spock.] I do not recognize the system. It does not look to be any area I recall visiting on the Enterprise. Unless this is one you traveled to, here?

Well, that's because it's not really a system - at least, not one you would actually find.

_{[ He came to stand beside Spock, leaning his shoulder against the
Vulcan's. He knew it was asking much of him, to allow him this continued
contact, but he needed it. Needed to keep convincing himself that Spock
was, in some fashion, real. ]}

I mean, look at it. It breaks half the laws of known planetary physics.

_{[ He shook his head. ]}

No, this... I suppose the way to put it is that this is a representation of my soul.

_{[ With utter surety he pointed to a blue planet swirling closest to
the sun at the center - the mirror to a blue and silver planet on the
opposite side. ]}

That's you.

[Spock looked at the planet as it swirled around the sun. Around...Jim? Well. If that didn't represent him well nothing else did.]

Me?

[He looks at the other blue and silver planet opposite of himself. At the other planets.]

I am assuming you are represented by the sun. And the other planets likewise represent those that are close to you.

[Spock gestures toward the blue and silver planet]

Doctor McCoy?

_{[ He nodded. ]}

Yup, that's him.

_{[ He pointed to others in turn, working out from the center, naming as
he went - Sulu, Chekov, Uhurah, Scotty, Jaylah - and more, some Spock
probably did not know the name of, their time with Kirk having been in the
Fleet. He pointed at the super nova, telling Spock it was Pike, and knowing
in his heart the comet was Khan, and the asteroid field was Krall. ]}

Basically my soul laid bare.

[Spock watched as the rest of the display was explained to him. He didn't know all the names, no, but it was almost comforting to not. It meant Jim had support here. He'd found people to depend upon and let in closer to him.

At the end he looked up at Jim calm and pleased.]

It is truly remarkable. As I have already known it to be.

_{[ He flushed a little bit at that look, but he smiled all the same.
]}

You're usually not one for flattery, Spock.

I merely state facts. Flattery is an unintended side effect.

[He not-smiles at Jim and then turns back to the display.]

Truly astounding. Though it is hardly a surprise you would envision yourself as the sun we all revolve around. [Nevermind how apt.]

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