dreams in digital

[thespaceopera]

[ Calibration Rooms ]
( for A-M characters )

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ROOMS BY CHARACTER

A - C Akeldama Alisha Diphda Allura Baku Ben Douglass Belthazar Carl Grimes Connor

D - F Escha Malier Eithan Paine Felix Gaeta

G - I Glenn Rhee Grievous Haggar

J - M James T. Kirk (OU) James T. Kirk (AU) Kaname Bucanneer Keith Kitty Pryde Kogarasumaru Kolivan Krolia Lance Leia Organa Leilani Lavellan Libra Loki Lordon Gesh Lup Maggie Rhee Magnus Burnsides Manji Messer Ihlefeld Mikleo Mirage Farina Jenius

(last updated: 1/21/19)

Comments

[abracafcku]

Uhh....

[Eloquent as always, Taako just kind of stares at Loki for a moment, his ears twitching back toward the Void and the sound of it. He's glad Loki's stepping away, but now he can get a really good look at him and it's... concerning? A little weird? Not that weird considering he's dating a guy whose face is legitimately a skull half the time, but it's the first time he's seen someone stuck between two different forms like this. It's like whatever that blue skin and red eye belong to is trying to bleed through and can't quite get out.]

Dunno actually. I just showed up here? Not reeeeally sure what's going on other than if I touch shit I get some crazy trip down memory lane.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki nods. ]

I keep my pain out here. Which can be difficult for others to deal with. It is not . . . dangerous, should you tread carefully.

[abracafcku]

[His hand unconsciously goes to his neck, but he quickly switches to rub at his shoulder instead. The memory of that giant purple dickwad choking Loki is still fresh in his mind, as it likely is for Loki too, considering it only happened not too long ago.]

Mmmyeah, kiiinda flubbed that one already. You got- [He glances back at the building with all its artifacts lying about, enticing and horrible in their own ways.] -a lot of that pain to seal up in there, huh, bud?

[dothelokimotion]

[ that he does. loki keeps all his pain out here. it's well hidden in reality, but in his mind, there are always traps. pain. but loki would prefer that to forgetting or pretending it never mattered. it's his love that is hidden, difficult to find. ]

There is a lot of history, I'm afraid, that comes with pain.

[abracafcku]

Yeah, I- [He huffs and sighs, running his hand through his hair and voice dropping low in a rare bout of empathy from him.] -fucking feel you on that one.

But there's gotta be some good shit in here, right? Like it's not just 1000 some odd-- [He pauses.] Honestly, I have no clue how old you are, but however old you are years of shitty shit all the time.

[dothelokimotion]

There was. But the narrative warped the truth. Things have improved but . . . [ loki trails off, uncharacteristically. ] . . . in here, it is difficult to make sense of it.

[abracafcku]

Living in a vault full of pain'll do that, noooo doubt about that.

[He moves a little so he can better look back at the observatory behind them. It's weird, in a way, locking everything up like this, but it also makes sense. Loki always seems like nothing bothers him, it's a carefully crafted persona and one that Taako, if he's being honest with himself, knows a little too much about.]

But things...well, they're not great since we're living on a spaceship while being kidnapped by fucking voyeuristic asshats, but they're not bad, right? Right now?

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki cocks his head, absorbing that. ]

No. But I died before things could truly change. Hence the cracks.

[ he gestures to them loosely. as one can see, they were close to healing, but they're still very apparent in this fabric of the mind. ]

[abracafcku]

Fair.

[It's not easy getting over death. Especially one as brutal as the one Loki suffered. Taako simply...didn't let himself think about his. He never talked to Magnus or Merle about it even though they all experienced the same thing. The likelihood of any of them giving a shit or taking it seriously was nil, and the likelihood of the conversation taking a deep dive into uncomfortable territory if they proved him wrong was too high for him to take the chance.]

Kinda weird that being kidnapped by space dicks is what gives you a second chance at healing though, huh?

[dothelokimotion]

Would you truly call it a second chance?

[ because loki isn't sold on that. ]

[abracafcku]

[He shrugs a little, rubbing the back of his neck.]

I mean, you're alive again, right? What else would you call it?

[dothelokimotion]

It is still something that can be taken away at a moment's notice. It does not belong to me. It belongs to someone else.

[abracafcku]

But that's life, isn't it?

I mean, second chances or no, that's how life is. [Whether they know it or not, death is always lurking around somewhere. Anyone can die, even gods, at any time.]

And death. I guess. In our cases, that's how death is, too. So might as well live it up while you got it.

[dothelokimotion]

[ bold words from someone who avoids making connections. loki squints at him briefly. ]

Is that what you do?

[abracafcku]

Pretty much?

[It's not entirely a lie? Taako lives by his impulses, doing what he wants when he wants to do it, taking what he needs and what he wants without regard to anyone else. It's an entirely selfish way to live and he's fine with that. He saves who he wants to save and is rude as fuck when he's slighted by someone.]

Don't see the point in wasting my time on this stink planet - or any stink planet. Taako's gonna live while the living's good.

[dothelokimotion]

[ it's really like looking into a mirror. this loki, however, just accepts this demurely. ]

Of course.

[abracafcku]

So why not you?

[He motions at all the stuff lying around, all the gateways to the pain that Loki tries to hide as hard as possible.]

A second chance is a second chance. If you hadn't been pulled here again-- Isn't it a blessing in disguise to be here? At least now you can keep on keeping on.

[dothelokimotion]

It still keeps me from all that I wanted. All that I fought for.

[ so while he's grateful to be alive, he still lost everything that had meaning to him. ]

[abracafcku]

And what would that be? The thing you wanted.

[Because he can understand, kind of, if Loki has unfinished business back in his planer reality. Taako does, too. He always feels the itch to get back there, making this place seem...tenuous at best.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ for the first time, loki looks uncharacteristically tight-lipped. ]

I will not say it here. It will shatter this place.

[abracafcku]

[That? Sounds bad. Taako shrinks a little, looking at the cracks in the walls like it might shatter at any moment.]

Yeah, okay, cool cool, sure, yeah definitely don't, uh....go shattering this place. Taako's good with not getting thrown into the Void, thaaaank you very much.

[dothelokimotion]

[ he blinks. ]

This is not the real Void. Only a shadow of it.

[abracafcku]

Or a shadow of it. If I'm gonna die by falling into an endless whatever-the-fuck that thing is, I at least deserve the real thing.

[So he can avoid the living fuck out of it.]

So do you see the memories when I do or is this a one-way movie deal? Because if you got anything nice in here? Thaaaat'd be cool. Nice treat for both of us.

[dothelokimotion]

[ loki considers that before shaking his head. ]

I can see glimpses, but it's not always very clear.

[abracafcku]

[Damn. Taako looks around, not sure where the exit is or what he has to do to get it to open. Maybe he has to touch more stuff? But if this is where Loki hides all his painful memories, Taako doesn't really want to accidentally go dredging up the worst shit. He already accidentally touched one thing he probably shouldn't have been privy to.]

Mmmkay....then....

[He stares at the objects scattered around and frowns.]

Anything in here that's not, like, horror and death then? 'Cause I think I've had my fill of that for awhile.